ache - a poem

Yesterday I felt incredibly lonely. My reaction to aloneness is fear and I can start to feel panic rising as I notice the way that loneliness shouts messages at me of who I am and who I’m not. I usually distract or numb out of loneliness but instead of pulling out too quickly, I am beginning to allow myself to sink into it to learn what can only be found underneath the fear. This is not easy, but I wonder if this could be one of the blessings of this season – the things we find when we’re finally still enough and alone enough to sink lower.

today the ache of my soul's aloneness

tugged continuously on my sleeve

begging me to find it a home

where it could finally belong.

I saw its silent desperation for connection

and in the absence of answers

we sat side by side

and without distracting her from the pain

we decided to let it break

our collective heart

and teach us that the ache

is the invitation to something deeper.