Helen Cottee
When grief took its seat
It makes my heart ache
To think of you in the indigo space
Between night and morning
And life and mourning
When you found her
Having left this world.
I can’t think of what your mind had to do
In those first split moments
And oh - your heart -
As it dawned with a cold chill
That she had gone.
I wish I could have stood next to you
As you opened the door,
And clutched your hand
Or maybe your soul
To hold it together in those first few
Bitter moments.
I wish I could have whispered
‘I’m here, my friend
This is not okay,
But you’ll be okay’
as the whir of sorrow
Whipped around you.
It makes me ache that you sat there alone
That you waited alone
That you counted the seconds alone
As grief took its seat next to you
Before I could.
And so I take my seat now,
Me and you
And maybe grief for a while longer.
I wasn’t there
But I am now.
